| Bitter Ramblings | |
|---|---|
| |
| Details | |
Story type |
Character Goal |
Event |
Quick Draw |
Previous Goal |
Let's Get Ready to Ramble |
Part 1
Description[]
- Ramblin' Rodriguez performs at an open mic.
Objectives
- Have Ramblin' Rodriguez Pour Out His Soul (3h)
- Have Fry Listen to the Blues (2h)
Rewards[]
- 150
100 
Story[ | ]
I'm performing at an open mic tonight.
So what!
That's my way of saying, "You're invited."
And "So what" is my way of saying "Unless you can score me a plus-one, forget it!"
Ugh! That was the most depressing song I ever heard. And I used to follow The Cure around on tour!
Too bad, 'cause I'm just getting started.
My next song is called "A List of People Who Never Said I Was Great".
Part 12
Amy, Hermes, that guy at the bus stop / Free Waterfall Jr. and URL the Robocop...
Part 2
Description[]
- Ramblin' Rodriguez performs at an open mic.
Objectives
- Have Amy Use a Record Player (4h)
Rewards[]
- 150
100
Story[ | ]
Bender, you gotta stop singin' the blues before you make everyone depressed.
Oh yeah? Well, maybe people need to be more depressed!
I'm speaking as a man who owns a lot of stock in the company that makes suicide booths.
How dare you interrupt my performance?! I will not be silenced!
Geez. I was only trying to help.
You can help by promoting my new album.
But you don't have a new album.
You obviously don't understand how the music business works.
Part 3
Description[]
- Ramblin' Rodriguez eases the pain.
Objectives
- Have Ramblin' Rodriguez Serenade the Stripperbots (6h)
- Have Amy Feel the Pain (4h)
Rewards[]
- 150 100
Story[ | ]
There's only one way for a blues singer to ease his pain.
I thought singing the blues was supposed to ease your pain.
Oh yeah... I guess there's that.
The way I was thinking of was shacking up with nameless floozies.
Alas, the floozies did not help.
They helped me. You stopped singing for a moment.
That was a mistake. But I'm back, with a new song bemoaning the low quality of today's floozies.
Well, how many floozies must a man sex up...
Part 4
Description[]
- Ramblin' Rodriguez feels better.
Objectives
- Have Ramblin' Rodriguez Play for Tips (1h)
- Have Amy Plug Her Ears (8h)
Rewards[]
- 300 200
Story[ | ]
You know, if you want to stop feeling depressed, you could try getting enough sleep, eating healthy, and drinking water instead of booze.
You're just a corporate stooge for Big Sleep, Big Health, and Big Water! Well, I'm not gonna get conned by their propaganda!
Come on, Bender, you chain-smoke cigars. Doesn't that make you a stooge for Big Tobacco?
No! Big Tobacco's propaganda goes down smooth, with no side effects!
Amy, I am happy to say I no longer need to sing, because I've cured my depression. You'll recall it was originally caused by nobody listening to my complaints.
But, thanks to a grueling schedule of nonstop walking around with a guitar and blues-singing, people now pay attention to my every word!
I'm sorry, what? I've gotten so used to your blues-singing, I've sort of started tuning you out.
[...]
Well, Amy was a moron so I swore I'd shoot her dead...