Death by 1000 Omicronians

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Death by 1000 Omicronians
Goal Omicronian Ship.png
Details
Story type
Side Goal
Event
Lrrr Strikes Back
Previous Goal
Invasion Nation


Part 1

Description[edit source]

Nixon asks for a favor.

Objectives

Rewards[edit source]

  • 50 Weed 75 XP

Story[edit | edit source]

Nixon Agnew Professor, I've decided to send your crew into battle against the Omicronians.

The Professor Why not send the Earthican army?

Nixon Agnew Because it got swallowed up in that catastrophic transdimensional rift your opened!

The Professor I did that?... Well, it appears I haven't lost my touch.


The Professor Thanks for fighting for your planet, Amy.

Amy Technically, my planet is Mars. But I'm willing to fight for Earth because they sell the best makeup.

The Professor You're preaching to the choir.


Part 2

Description[edit source]

Professor sends his crew to fight

Objectives

Rewards[edit source]

  • 50 Weed 75 XP

Story[edit | edit source]

The Professor Fry, I have an important message. Do you remember your president, Nixon?

Bachelor Fry If he's complaining about those bills I have to pay--

The Professor No, that was yesterday, remember? Today he's commanding you and the crew to mount a space attack against the Omicronians.

Bachelor Fry Well, orders are orders, I guess. Did the PResident mention whether I had to wear pants?

The Professor No, he was strangely silent on the topic.


Bachelor Fry I almost didn't make it back from that mission alive!

Bachelor Fry In retrospect, it was probably a mistake to go into space pantsless.

The Professor Yes, you'd think we all would've learned that lesson after Apollo 13.


Part 3

Description[edit source]

Teh Omicronians get pushed back.

Objectives

Rewards[edit source]

  • 50 Weed 75 XP

Story[edit | edit source]

Bachelor Fry If we don't push back against the Omicronian advances, we're doomed.

Amy When a guy makes unwanted advances to me, I push back bu putting him politely into the "Friend Zone".

Bachelor Fry It's a nice idea, Amy, but the Friend Zone is in a completely different quadrant of the galaxy.

Amy I know that. I was really just trying to suggest you put your pants back on.


Bachelor Fry Thanks for looking out for me during that mission, Bender.

Bender C'mon, buddy, you know Bender's always got your back. That's where you keep your wallet.

Bachelor Fry Aha! You finally figured out the real reason I started going pantsless!

Bender Really? So where do you keep your wallet?

Bender Oh, dear God.


Part 4

Description[edit source]

Nixon commends the crew.

Objectives

Rewards[edit source]

  • 50 Weed 75 XP

Story[edit | edit source]

Nixon Agnew For your collective service, I'd like to present the Planet Express crew with my highest award: the Nixon Medal of Secret Honor.

The Professor Hmm. They're identical to the regular Medal of Honor, except they're green.

Nixon Agnew That's moss. Agnew had to rob a couple graves at Arlington to find them.


Amy The crew is exhausted, Professor. Can we take a night off from fighting for our freedom and go clubbing?

The Professor Clubbing? In case you'd forgotten, the Omicronian curfew dusk-to-dawn is still in effect.

Amy Fine, we'll keep fighting. But only long enough to get our nightlife back!

Amy Freedom can wait 'til after the disco.


Part 5

Description[edit source]

Scruffy is ready to serve.

Objectives

Rewards[edit source]

  • 50 Weed 75 XP

Story[edit | edit source]

Scruffy Scruffy's ready to fight for his planet. Can't wait to tear the head offa one of them alien reptiles with my bare hands. Mm-hm.

The Professor Good man. But I think your maintenance skills would be put to better use in combat support.

Scruffy Suit yourself. All I'm sayin' is, one way or another, someone's gonna get their head torn off.


Scruffy Scruffy roughed up them aliens good. Mm-hmmm.

The Professor I recognize that tone, Scruffy, and no, you're not getting a raise.

Scruffy Why does ever'body always forget how rich I am?


Part 6

Description[edit source]

The robots prepare.

Objectives

Rewards[edit source]

  • 50 Weed 75 XP

Story[edit | edit source]

Bender As a car salesman, you must know a lot about strategy. How would you deal with the Omicronians?

Malfunctioning Eddie Simple: offer to surrender unconditionally.

Bender That's ridiculous and stupid!

Malfunctioning Eddie I'm not finished. When they accept, you tell them you just have to get your manager to okay the offer, and you leave them stewing for fifteen minutes.

Malfunctioning Eddie Then you come back and kill them.


Malfunctioning Eddie Well, this is where we part ways. But we'll always be brothers in arms. And I'm sure I'll see you at the Anti-Omicronian Resistance reunions.

Bender Yeah. I'll miss you, buddy.

Malfunctioning Eddie Should we hug each other?

Bender Yeah, but let's wait a minute 'til no one's watching.

Bender [...]


Part 7

Description[edit source]

Professor issues a warning

Objectives

Rewards[edit source]

  • 50 Weed 75 XP

Story[edit | edit source]

The Professor Remember, when you land on the Omicronian nursery planet, be sure not to eat any delicious popplers.

The Professor That means you, Fry!

Bachelor Fry Why am I being singled out?

The Professor You're the only crew member who owns a bib with a picture of a poppler on it!


Bachelor Fry I sure worked up an appetite while not eating those Popplers all day. Can you get me a salad?

Bender What?! Fry, are you feeling all right?

Bachelor Fry C'mon, I eat salads sometimes!

Bender It's not that. I can't believe you asked me to get you something.


Part 8

Description[edit source]

URL kicks some butt.

Objectives

Rewards[edit source]

  • 50 Weed 75 XP

Story[edit | edit source]

URL Mind if this bad-ass cop joins your little mission?

Bender Aren't you guys supposed to be enforcing Lrrr's curfew?

URL We did our job too well. The streets are so empty, doesn't take more than four cops to patrol the whole city.

URL It's lonely out there with nobody to talk to or beat up.


URL Thanks, Bender. I needed to kick some Omicronian butt.

Bender You're welcome. Anything to enable violence.

URL "Anything to enable violence." That has a nice ring to it.

URL I'm gonna ask the chief to get that painted on our squad cars, in place of "To Serve and Protect".


Part 9

Description[edit source]

Bender plans to sell some Popplers.

Objectives

Rewards[edit source]

  • 50 Weed 75 XP

Story[edit | edit source]

Bender I've got a plan to steal some Popplers and sell them on the black market.

Amy Popplers, Omicronian Weed... is there anything you won't sell on the black market?

Bender Yes there is. I would never sell children.

Bender You make more renting them out to factories.


Amy I threw your cargo of Popplers off the ship before we took off.

Bender What?! How dare you! I was counting on selling them to fund a few hours of retirement!

Amy We'll be lucky if Lrrr doesn't kill us just for having brought them on board!

Bender Eh, you gave 'em back. He won't care.

Amy He will if he finds out I ate a couple!

See also[edit | edit source]